Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Fall too soon

   While driving through the small college town of university city, huddled and hidden within the bustle of lives and moving energy of  philadelphia, i found myself waiting in "moving day" traffic for the students... all i wanted that day was a little greek treat, a pork gyro piled high with tzatizike and patates, i did enjoy the sandwich but was left to sit in the city waiting as kids piled lamps and posters, clothes and mini fridges, and all the others things they "need" to prosper during their coming education.  I saw dads grimacing as they lifted items and impatiently waited for their daughters to move out of the way, their heave and ho of items that they are to old and out of shape to be hauling.  School is starting and fall seems to be coming but as i watched the commotion and excitement of new beginnings abounding my eyes traveled towards the sky, ahead of us i saw this tree, as we crept closer to it a sadness began to creep over me. 
    The tree was dying for the year, dropping and letting go of the green of their leaves, letting go of the warm days which fed the blossoming colors feeding from its branches, i thought for a moment about what day is was and was shocked to realize that we were still in the dog days of august, riding the last of the summer heat and sunshine on a final set of waves.  This tree's appearance has thrown me for a loop- why has it dropped it leaves?  in my recollection trees should still be hanging on, still be feeding the green of their leaves.  This is to early, this is off, this is overwhelming to my senses and mind, this is a physical manifestation of our shift- our shift in energies, in realities, in communities, in our earth, in us.  
    I try to welcome change, ive learned it will come regardless of my wishes and without welcoming it, we don't help ourselves by pushing it away, but hinder our progress and growth, as i write this i know it yet i sit wanting to fight this change, this shift of seasons that is happening, in the now i am realizing that this too should be welcomed and not feared, fear? yeah it scares me, my deep patterns try to surface and trigger emotions that could paralyze my growth if i let them.  i wont, this writing that started as griping has been releasing again for my ongoing awareness and growth.  I wont mourn these trees, they are a new beginning, i won't mourn the summer it will come again, the time has come for changes again- i will welcome it. i do welcome it.


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